Bunkie Stories in the Drug Program | Noah’s Story

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Hey guys, Noah, here.

As I mentioned a couple of weeks back in April or May, I moved down to the drug program unit and moved into a sweet room full of easy-going guys that liked to play around a lot and didn’t take things too seriously.

At first, there were a few guys on there way out of the program, and I knew they wouldn’t be there long, and one was my bunk, Steve.

He had had over ten years in the BOP and had made his way around the country. He had a lot of interesting stories from both in the bureau and his life before prison. I could tell he was once a man you wouldn’t want to mess with on a bad day, but a decade in prison had since tamed him.

  

I also guessed that his recent experiences in the drug program had helped him get to his new demeanor. What I learned from him was you get out of the program what you put in, and so I did.

He then moved on to the complete other side of the building once he was done with the program and I got a random bunkie from the unit up the hill as I had just done myself a week or so prior, and his name was Zaka.

The most interesting thing about Zaka was he has a son named Noah, so that was our first connection.

Man, we had a blast in that room for the 10-14 months that we were in the program together. I don’t know which was more therapeutic, the drug program itself, or the atmosphere we created in that room after RDAP hours.

I remember, at one point, Zaka telling me how much he appreciated us bunking together in this room. He could be having the worst day of his prison time, but 10 minutes back in the room, he is laughing his ass off and has forgotten whatever was bothering him. 

The funniest moments in that room ranged from listening to Zaka’s co-defendant (who is the real-life Billy Madison by the way) rant about conspiracy theories such as not going to the moon, to Fat Boy telling us stories about growing up in Detroit and hanging his buddies chain out the window to pick up girls, to a guy named Woody (who used to work for the Cartel) that went from, “I don’t play that gay shit,” to becoming one of the fruitiest guys in the room. Then there was Dr. Winfield (not a real doctor by the way) reading his RSAs (a tool in RDAP that stands for rational self-analysis) to the room which ranged from twisting hair to sexual frustrations, or us teasing our roommate Pepper about wearing his socks pulled up to his knees like a schoolgirl.

Whatever it was it was hard to be in that room and maintain a negative frame of mind, it just wasn’t allowed. I miss that room now as I have also finished RDAP and moved to the complete other side but it was also a little too wild at times as everyone is always programming and working on stuff from the program after hours.

The complete other side, where I live now, is up on the top floor…up three flights of stairs and we call it the penthouse suite because nobody comes up there because they are too lazy to walk up the stairs or say it’s too quiet.

You can take a nap, read a book, or just get some me time in when you need it without getting bothered.

I moved into a great room but the only problem is everyone was leaving within the next several months. The good side of that however is I get to move in with people of my choosing and I can build a new room with the desired environment. Sometimes the best roommates, or bunkies as we call them, can come from a random selection but the downside can far outweigh the upside if the wrong one moves in with you. 

One thing I have learned is that I can pretty much put up with anything as I have had a bunch of various bunkies while doing my time…all shapes, sizes, color, religion, and personalities.

The only thing I can’t put up with is if my bunkies smell. The bunkie that I have had for the past month is leaving next week, and I am trying to get Zaka to move over, so hopefully, that goes as planned, and I can ride this bunk arrangement out till next September when I go home. We’ll see… 

Thanks for listening!
Noah